Just when it couldn't get any worse
Oh I suppose it can always get worse but it certainly doesn't feel like it could.
My XH lost his job. With the loss of his job comes the loss of my spousal support and child support until he finds another. I'm trying not to panic and trying to put and keep everything into perspective, but it's a little hard. I know that I'm capable and will find a way to get through this, I know that it will somehow work out, and I do have tremendous faith in John and his income earning capabilities. I wonder what it is that I am supposed to be learning from all of this. It doesn't seem possible that one person would endure so much in such a short period of time. It's funny, I thought I was depressed before, I thought I had it bad before, I thought things were hard before; geez, I guess the universe was just getting started in the lessons that I was to learn.
The best part of this whole John losing his job thing; it's my fault. They told him that since the divorce he just hasn't been the same and his performance has been lacking. Just one more thing to be my fault. One more thing to have guilt over, and one more thing to feel awful about. It's so, so lovely.
As I have been freaking out about my sudden and unexpected loss of income and the reality that I need to make a lot of money to keep everything I have in my life, (including my home,) Marilyn assured me that she would help me out. She said that in a worse case scenario, she would move in with me, despite the fact that her stbx would hate that. That, of course, is not why I would want her to move in with me. That, would be a terrible way for two people to start off a committed relationship and I won't even consider it until she ends her relationship completely with her stbx, which she doesn't seem to understand. Her gesture was sweet, just unrealistic.
She's not ready for that anyway. She still doesn't know what she wants, and frankly, I'm getting just a bit tired of riding the rollercoaster along with her.
Bottom line: I'm stressed out, I'm cranky, I have my period, I'm anxious, and I'm sick and tired of all of this bullshit all of the time.
My XH lost his job. With the loss of his job comes the loss of my spousal support and child support until he finds another. I'm trying not to panic and trying to put and keep everything into perspective, but it's a little hard. I know that I'm capable and will find a way to get through this, I know that it will somehow work out, and I do have tremendous faith in John and his income earning capabilities. I wonder what it is that I am supposed to be learning from all of this. It doesn't seem possible that one person would endure so much in such a short period of time. It's funny, I thought I was depressed before, I thought I had it bad before, I thought things were hard before; geez, I guess the universe was just getting started in the lessons that I was to learn.
The best part of this whole John losing his job thing; it's my fault. They told him that since the divorce he just hasn't been the same and his performance has been lacking. Just one more thing to be my fault. One more thing to have guilt over, and one more thing to feel awful about. It's so, so lovely.
As I have been freaking out about my sudden and unexpected loss of income and the reality that I need to make a lot of money to keep everything I have in my life, (including my home,) Marilyn assured me that she would help me out. She said that in a worse case scenario, she would move in with me, despite the fact that her stbx would hate that. That, of course, is not why I would want her to move in with me. That, would be a terrible way for two people to start off a committed relationship and I won't even consider it until she ends her relationship completely with her stbx, which she doesn't seem to understand. Her gesture was sweet, just unrealistic.
She's not ready for that anyway. She still doesn't know what she wants, and frankly, I'm getting just a bit tired of riding the rollercoaster along with her.
Bottom line: I'm stressed out, I'm cranky, I have my period, I'm anxious, and I'm sick and tired of all of this bullshit all of the time.
posted by Kathryn at
8:34 PM
2 Comments:
if your ex loses his job, he doesn't have to pay support? i didn't know that.
Well, he certainly can have it adjusted by the court. Obviously the support is based on his income and if he doesn't have any income that would present a problem. I know he would never put our children in jeopardy in any way, but it is a worry.
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