To my former friends
Dear Former Friends,
I hope that this letter finds you all happy and well. Of course I wouldn't know if you were happy or well, or if you were sad and sick, because you don't talk to me anymore. Oh sure, some of you are nice to me when you see me, smile and wave, ask me how I am, but that's it. You don't really want to know how I am, you don't want to know how I'm feeling, and you don't want to know what I'm doing in my life.
I celebrated my birthday a little while ago. None of you brought me a gift, sent me a card, or even bothered to call. I wasn't expecting a surprise party or anything, but hell, you could have called. I missed you all on my birthday, I always enjoyed celebrating a special day with you. I miss you all a lot, all of the time.
I know that you feel justified in shunning me, ignoring me, hating me even. I know that you feel I shattered something in our relationship that you feel like you need to cut me out of your life. I just thought that I meant more than that to you; I know you meant more to me. I do not judge you for judging me. I'm not mad at you for being mad at me. I understand and I forgive you, I'm just hurt, and that pain sneaks up on me sometimes.
Just so you know, I would never walk away from you the way that you have walked away from me. I would never turn my back on you in your time of need and hold you to some standard that I have no business doing. I would stand by you and look after you as I always have and always will. There may come a day when you need me again, and guess what? I'll be there for you, at your beck and call, any time day or night. I won't change and become bitter because of how you've treated me.
I made some very hard choices and went along with some difficult decisions. I stepped outside of where I was and took inventory and had to make changes about my life. I'm sorry that you don't approve and I'm sorry that it has made you feel uncomfortable, but you know what? It had nothing to do with you and it's completely arrogant for you to think that it did. Your one and only job as my friend was to be my friend. I never asked for your approval or your blessings, I never asked you to go along with anything that I was doing or to be happy about it. I never asked for anything, but I did expect for you to be there, still loving me, no matter what.
Because that, my friend, is what friends do, but you, my friend, were not a friend to me.
I hope that this letter finds you all happy and well. Of course I wouldn't know if you were happy or well, or if you were sad and sick, because you don't talk to me anymore. Oh sure, some of you are nice to me when you see me, smile and wave, ask me how I am, but that's it. You don't really want to know how I am, you don't want to know how I'm feeling, and you don't want to know what I'm doing in my life.
I celebrated my birthday a little while ago. None of you brought me a gift, sent me a card, or even bothered to call. I wasn't expecting a surprise party or anything, but hell, you could have called. I missed you all on my birthday, I always enjoyed celebrating a special day with you. I miss you all a lot, all of the time.
I know that you feel justified in shunning me, ignoring me, hating me even. I know that you feel I shattered something in our relationship that you feel like you need to cut me out of your life. I just thought that I meant more than that to you; I know you meant more to me. I do not judge you for judging me. I'm not mad at you for being mad at me. I understand and I forgive you, I'm just hurt, and that pain sneaks up on me sometimes.
Just so you know, I would never walk away from you the way that you have walked away from me. I would never turn my back on you in your time of need and hold you to some standard that I have no business doing. I would stand by you and look after you as I always have and always will. There may come a day when you need me again, and guess what? I'll be there for you, at your beck and call, any time day or night. I won't change and become bitter because of how you've treated me.
I made some very hard choices and went along with some difficult decisions. I stepped outside of where I was and took inventory and had to make changes about my life. I'm sorry that you don't approve and I'm sorry that it has made you feel uncomfortable, but you know what? It had nothing to do with you and it's completely arrogant for you to think that it did. Your one and only job as my friend was to be my friend. I never asked for your approval or your blessings, I never asked you to go along with anything that I was doing or to be happy about it. I never asked for anything, but I did expect for you to be there, still loving me, no matter what.
Because that, my friend, is what friends do, but you, my friend, were not a friend to me.
posted by Kathryn at
12:35 PM
4 Comments:
Your narcissism is appalling. I've gone through these posts and I'll give you this advice-stop trying to find validation for your shitty ways from other people.
Your concern for yourself, however, is touching. Maybe you should become "The Masturbatory Single Girl" so you don't do anyone else any damage with your narcissism. I hope your daughters take after their father. I really do.
Hi anonymous, who is too much of a pussy to put his/her real name.
Actually most children I believe are narcissistic by nature so that would deduct that they do take after me, not their father. They do look quite a bit like him though, and he's a good looking guy so that's good thing.
Thanks for stopping by my site and taking the time to comment; I'm sorry that you feel the need to be so mean to someone that you don't know, but I won't hold it against you.
I blog for myself, not because I'm looking for validation from anyone. I don't even expect anyone to read what I have to say, it's just a creative outlet for me to try to figure some really hard stuff out.
I hope that you have a nice day!
Oh, and fuck off.
Someone very close to me had the same thing happen when she went to rehab and became sober. She quickly realized who her real friends were. I think deep down it was very painful for her :( It's sad your friends couldn't be more accepting. You seem very nice and I bet they're missing out!
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