Choosing to be gay

I recently upgraded my cable subscription to accommodate my new Comcast DVR. With my upgraded cable line-up I now receive The Logo Channel, which is a new cable station for the GLBTQ community. With my new DVR, I chose several shows on Logo to record. One of the shows I recorded and watched last night was The Advocate Newsmagazine. It is a partner between The Advocate and MTV for The Logo Channel. It was a fabulous show and I encourage you to go the the website and check out some of the interviews.

I really enjoyed the interview with Sheryl Swoopes, WNBA player who recently came out. I could really identify with a lot of the things that she shared and her thoughts and feelings about coming out as a lesbian after living the first part of her life seemingly straight. I found myself chuckling at some of the things that she said, how she felt, and her view of "choosing" to be gay.

I share her perspective.

I do believe that there are many, many GLBTQ people who were born with that orientation already in their DNA. I also believe that there are many gay people who fall in love with a person who happens to be of their same sex and they choose to be gay because they are following their heart and soul. And I also believe there are people who fall somewhere in between.

I was straight my whole life and didn't know any different. I fell in love with a woman and for me it was like a light went off in my head; suddenly things that didn't make any sense or felt strange before made sense or felt "right." Now that I've had that experience, I choose to continue to live my life as a lesbian because that is what I now prefer. If I were forced to live my life as a heterosexual, I would probably survive; I certainly wouldn't be living completely, but I would manage. I would survive because I already have a reference of living a straight life; other lesbians I know could not live a heterosexual lifestyle, even if they had to, and would probably die if they had to have relations with a man!

Ms. Swoopes was asked if she was prepared to take flack from the GLBTQ community for claiming that her homosexuality was a "choice." She replied that she knew that she was going to take flack from a LOT of people.

I think that our society is much more tolerant to people being able to express their sexuality and their love in so many different ways. The old "rules" have gone by the wayside and people are free to allow themselves to go to all of the parts of themselves and try it out. It's happening every day, to people everywhere. In my own small world I know of TWO other women who are my age, and after living their lives straight, marrying, and having children fell in love with women and are now in lesbian relationships. Both of those women as well as myself had this "realization" in the last 18 months. Cynthia Nixon, from Sex in the City, as well as Ms. Swoopes also make up our group.

Whether someone is born gay, chooses to be gay, or just prefers to be gay; it should matter not. All people should be embraced for who they are; who they choose to love at the time should be a non-issue. The freedom to be who you are and love who you want without labeling yourself, should be accepted by the straight community, but especially accepted by the GLBTQ community who has worked so hard for acceptance, understanding and validation of who they are and their relationships.

Check out the complete video interview here.