Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Glamorous Waitressing Job, Day One

Today was the first day of my glamorous waitressing job, and I somehow managed to survive it.

Last night I couldn't sleep and I was having all kinds of crazy thought running around in my head. I was anxious about everything but mostly: that everyone would hate me, I would make a stupid mistake, I would look completely stupid in my new glamorous waitressing outfit. You know, the normal.

Finally, I said "fuck it," took a xanex, and went to sleep.

Then this morning, I met my lovely confused girlfriend for coffee and she gave me a pep talk; it was a good thing until I got in the car and started driving to my new glamorous waitressing job. I nearly had a panic attack. I could feel my chest tightening and couldn't tell if I was breathing or not. I was having visions of having to stop at the Emergency room in my glamorous waitressing outfit and ask them to make sure I wasn't having a heart attack, (remembering that I will have one between now and 11 years from now.) Aren't I a psycho?

Once there, I relaxed a bit and all was well. The bartender who did my bar orientation shared with me that there was a question of her father's paternity (to her,) and that she didn't know if her husband and she were going to make it, and that her kid isn't eating because he's getting molars. She also told me a bit about the bar.

During the lunch rush, I stood there, (looking good in my outfit,) and watched the food go out. Most of the people were very nice and very helpful, but I've already picked out my new co-workers who are going to be a pain in my ass.

Bonus about my new glamorous waitressing job: There are two "family" members who work there. They are a couple, and of course I came out to one them when given the right opportunity. She congratulated me on seeing the light and welcomed me aboard (I'm not sure if she was welcoming me aboard to the restaurant, or to being a dyke?)

That was about it, tomorrow, I go at it again.

3 Comments:

Blogger Pissy Britches said...

You know..it is so funny how people open up to someone so quickly. You don't know this fucking person but yet they are telling you all this shit and you are thinking to yourself.."UGH, IF YOU ONLY KNEW ABOUT MY FUCKING LIFE, YOU WOULD SHUT YOUR STUPID PIEHOLE"
Well, at least that is what I would think because like you said in the post before..LIFE IS ALL ABOUT ME..ME ME ME ME..EVERYTHING IS ME!
See, it wasn't all that bad though. You will do great..Hope you make lots of fabulous $$$$

Wednesday, April 27, 2005 7:11:00 PM  
Blogger Southern Fried Girl said...

Can I ask what restaurant you work at? It sounds suspiciously like where I work. :)

Tuesday, May 03, 2005 6:13:00 PM  
Blogger The Recovering Straight Girl said...

SFG,
I think that all restaurants are so very similar in the fucked up people that they attract to work for them.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005 8:57:00 PM  

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